What If


Mwandah

What If

By Mwandah

Fri 14 Jun, 2019 19:48:25 EAT
100 Views | 1 Comments | 2 Likes

#depression  #hurt  #pain  


What If

I'm here today
Suffering,
Hurting,
Crying,
Tears rolling down my visage like a waterfall
But you don't notice!

I'm starving
Yet You think I am trimming my body to a perfect shape
I am smiling
Yet You think I am happy and leading a dreamy life.
I'm broke
Yet when I ask for money
You think I have to be joking.
How can a girl
With my face and features
Possibly go hungry or broke?
Whoever said my body and money are directly proportional!?

I'm failing in school
So You think it is because I have not studied.
Call me a joker who values not her future;
A party maniac.
Well,
Have you considered
That just maybe, I failed because I was too busy trying to fend
Fend for myself and get a morsel for my stomach?
Just maybe,
I was caught up in a landlord match where he had the upper hand?
Just maybe,
I don’t even have the materials to study in the first place
Because my mind is on my troubles every time I'm in a lecture hall
Maybe, I failed because I couldn't get time to study midst
The horrors which no one can unsee?

Just maybe...
The teacher who wanted my body for an A was not successful!
Maybe I party to forget my troubles
Maybe I drink because it's my solace
Maybe in my little world
Booze and puffs are the only true friends!

What if...

What if the world is not my home?
What if I’m stranger in my own lone?
What if I disappeared and seized to exist?
Would it all be fine?
Would my world be dreamy and perfect?
Zero flaws,
Zero claws
What lies in the world beyond?
Maybe I should step out,
Find out
It couldn’t be worse than this lonely place
Full of fake pleasantries
Nobody needs me
Right?!

By Mwandah
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Comments

  • Agnes Waithera
    U have taken words out of my mouth,that i can relate.lvly
    16 wk ago

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