Scared To Be Lonely

So hurt,
I do not want to look at you tonight,
I want to pack and run as far as I can,
As far as my feet can carry me,
These are just my thoughts and so this is my reality...

I fight I fight with the weakness in me,
I want to hurt you,
I want to make sure you feel what am feeling,
But am weak to show you how it really feels like,
Then you hug me and I cry it all out,
And I never pack or run because am scared to be lonely...

You repeat the same mistake,
I consult, you deny,
Using anger as your shield, making me look like a bad liar:
I get punished for that,
You hit me against the wall,
I crawl to the couch my face covered in tears.
I did nothing wrong,
I cry a river scared of your hands touching me,
Making love is what we end up to,
Was that his way of saying sorry?
Still, I can never forget how you hurt me.
Still, I can never park nor run for my dear life.

I want it to be just like the movies
That when I leave you will come looking for me,
But that is unlike you,
I know you will never come for me...

I Have a choice, but then again
Am scared to be lonely,
Waiting for the right man to come to my resque,
Love in shambles...