My Dearest

Today I looked around,
I watched my surrounding,
Close enough,
I wanted to know more,
To feel more ,
To feel a little less,
My dearest why the solemn face?

Green yet with a hint of fading,
Sweet yet bitter still lingers,
Smile so wide yet frown lines still etched up,
Dimples light up her face,
Yet her soul so dark with pain,
Twenty so far fetched,
But her experiences say otherwise,
My dearest why the pain?

Vicious fight,
Scars so deep,
Suffocating every healing,
Always hurting non stop,
Now you think it's too much,
No.. It's just the beginning,
Reality ain't nothing,
I want something,.
That will make me forget,
Make me get lost in another world,
A world free of reality,
My dearest why fret?

Sweet sensation,
No pain,
Just smoke lighting up my room,
Just half filled bottles,
The taste far from sweet,
Sour and burning all through my throat,
Yes it's solved it all,
It's a colourful world,
Nothing that I know of,
Just endless laughter,
My dearest why the lost weight?

Longlasting,
Not really,
Morning will bring it all back,
Then I'll want to forget again,
My dearest I want to feel again.