3:47a.m

Wrapped up in my own oblivion,
Scarce of this world,
Void of hate and lust,
Its only Tuesday,
But it feels like Friday,
I want to drink,
I want to feel the burning sensation in my throat,
I want to dim my memory,
I want to be consumed in the darkness,
I want to wake up dead.

Despair is painted on the walls,
My crestfallen expression,
Is a definition of lost hope,
Promises broken all the time,
Nothing feels real anymore,
Who am I kidding?
I don't know how to feel anymore,
I don't know how to live anymore,
So take me away,
Lead me out of this life,
Give me the freedom I yearn for.

When I thought I had conquered,
It all came back crumbling down to pieces,
I was left to decide which piece to pick up first,
But how could I?
It kept breaking up all over again,
Eventually I got tired,
That's why I'm here today,
And that's why I won't be there tomorrow.

When I'm gone,
I want to see you happy,
I want you to smile always,
I want you to always paint your world blue,
Calm and serene just like you,
Exactly how you make me feel,
Don't let the black clouds cover you up,
Outshine it all,
I'm sorry I won't be there to see,
I'm sorry it came to this,
Please don't hate me,
Because for once I'm truly happy.

Pen down,
I set myself for the unknown,
A journey I led myself to,
A path I chose on my own,
Music cranked up to 50,
I let myself down,
Last thoughts.....
3:47 a.m